NEW BIO FOR NEW BLOG READERS

LAST WEEK WE HAD BLOG READERS FROM 7 DIFFERENT COUNTRIES, 8 IF YOU ADD TEXAS. BELOW IS A NEW REVISED BIO. NEW BLOG READERS ARE ALWAYS WELCOME!

Glenn was born at a very early age in a log cabin  that he helped his father build. His early childhood was marked by malnutrition and lack of clean drinking water. He was adopted by a Korean family and was sent a monthly care package of fish heads and rice. Often the fish heads would be stolen from the package by the rural mail man who had several undernourished children at home.

 

The lack of a proper diet soon produced embarrassing results. He was sent home from the third grade because he had so many cavities that he talked with an echo. His parents knew they could turn Glenn's funny speech to a profitable advantage. When the carnival left the county fair, Glenn  unwillingly left with them.

 

He toured the entire summer with the carnival and was billed as the World's Fastest Repeating Talker. Through the concern of the Three-Eyed Man and The Himalayan Yak Lady he was given a bus ticket home just before the start of the fourth grade. His parent's were so glad to see him they sold the family milk cow and pet turkey and had his teeth pulled and replaced with a used set of metal dentures. Unfortunately, as they left the dentist office a rogue bolt of lightening struck Glenn in the head, welding his young mouth shut.

 

It was not until his junior year in high school, when he enrolled in vocational welding, was he able to once again speak and eat normally.  During this new-found freedom he learned that 7-Up was not green and the earth was not flat.

 

After high school, he entered the military and worked on the development of the highly-classified crossbow. Following the Army, he put himself through correspondence night school and was elected president of his class. Armed with confidence, he wrote two New York Times Best Sellers:"Lawn Darts For Dummies" and "How To Quit Smoking In 80 Years."

 

He has served on the President's Council of Alchemy and spends most of his spare time attempting to develop a bio-degradable bubble gum. Glenn is a much sought-after speaker and welcomes invitations where a free meal will be served.

GLENN <><
JUST WEST OF YESTERDAY