CLASS OF 1983 REUNION AT REEL ‘EM INN MOTEL
(The events and characters in this story are fictitious and any similarity between persons living or dead is purely coincidental.)
“Hey Bones, you look like a candidate for a Veggie Diet Systems commercial!”
“Ok Mister Prom King, I hear the drug store has a BOGO sale on Hair Grow for men!”
The good natured jabs and put downs continued for the rest of Friday afternoon as the Class of 1983 checked into the lakeside Reel ‘Em Inn Motel for their 30th Reunion. The reunion committee selected this motel because of an eye-watering off-season offer to price all rooms at 1983 rates! The motel was within easy walking distance of several mid-price restaurants and the ubiquitous fast food establishments.
Three tour busses arrived at the motel at 5pm to transport the non-stop talking Class of 1983, their spouses, and in some cases, dates, to a large banquet room at the civic center for an informal catered buffet dinner.
Mayor Gibson welcomed them and said he hoped they would not act like a bunch of Baptists who held their annual state convention in his fair city last month. The mayor said, “Those Baptists came to town with a copy of the Ten Commandments in one hand and a ten dollar bill in the other hand. They vowed not to break either one!”
Bill Henderson, president of the Class of 1983, welcomed everyone and asked all to stand as the class secretary read the names of classmates who had graduated to Eternity. A moment of silence was observed in their honor.
President Henderson next tried his best imitation of Principal Mr. Snider who was “The Man” at good old Eastern Heights High School in 1983. “Students, here’s the schedule for this weekend:
1. A short business meeting will follow dessert.
2. After the busses take us back to the motel, a VCR tape of the 1982 District Football Championship game will be on the lobby TV, the Rainbow Trout conference room will have a Dutch wet bar, and the Brook Trout conference room will serve complementary coffee and soft drinks.
3. You are on your own for breakfast. If you signed up for the bowling tourney, be at the front desk at 11am for a bus to King Salmon Lanes.
4. Two busses will leave the motel at Noon for a two hour mall shopping trip and a short tour of the historic downtown district with a refreshment stop at the Depot Museum and Snack Bar.
5. Business Casual dress for the catered dinner at the Elks Club party room. A DJ will play 80’s hits and dancing is optional. All three busses will leave the motel at 7pm with an estimated return around midnight.
6. Al Binger, one of our classmates and ordained Methodist minister, will hold a short devotional meeting at 10am in the Brook Trout conference room.
7. At 10:30am, our final time together will be a special Brunch Buffet for our class and guests in the Rainbow conference room.
8. Motel check out time is 1pm.
“Hey, Henderson, don’t quit your day job! That was a terrible impression of Warden Snider,” shouted Billy Ray McCalaster.
“Right after lunch count Mr. Wise Guy, I want to see you in my office,” the president shot back.
A roar of laughter filled the room of classmates and friends. Billy Ray’s face became very red.
Dessert was served. The treasurer’s report was presented and approved. And five grads were elected to the 40th reunion committee, with two alternates. The meeting was adjourned and the talking continued unabated until the second announcement to load the busses.
Back at the motel most of the football players made an out of shape rush to the lobby after grabbing a soft drink from the vending machine.
Bill Henderson, class president, made a short stay in the lobby and joked with the players on the team he quarterbacked to a 14-13 victory over the heavily favored cross town rival--- Western Hills. His last second “Hail Mary” to Buddy Adams in the end zone and dead center PAT clinched it. Henderson said, “Guys, we could do the same play a hundred times and probably never duplicate it again.” All agreed.
He next went to the coffee and soft drinks room and chatted with his wife and listened to all of the stories about children and grandchildren. In addition there was much talk about divorces, second marriages, and tattoos in unusual locations. He was thankful Evelyn, his wife, and he just celebrated their 25th Anniversary.
In muted, almost inaudible, tones a few women talked of cosmetic surgery and menopause. All of a sudden he felt very out of place. He wondered to himself when his libido would change. He hoped not soon.
His final stop was in the room where beer and mixed drinks were served. When he opened the door the noise and alcohol smell nearly chased him away. Bill and his wife would share a bottle of Champaign on their anniversary. That was their self-imposed drinking limit.
Billy Ray yelled from across the room, “Gents, somebody better hum “Hail to the Chief” for our wonderful class president. *%^&, he was Mister Hero at good old Eastern Heights prison. Here’s some breaking news: Most of you don’t know he stole Evelyn away from me just three days before I was going to propose to her. Talk about your Trophy Wives, for two years she was my steady Trophy Girlfriend. She and I were close---I mean very, very close! Now what do you overweight, stressed out, never at home business executives think of that?”
By now Bill had made his way over to confront the obviously drunk Billy Ray.
“Billy Ray, let’s go out into the hall and talk about your inappropriate comments about Evelyn.”
“No way Jose; I’m staying right here where I can get another double Wild Turkey headache maker. Boys, for two years I was number two on the football team depth chart. Then wham, bam, old Coach Alfred jumps Mister Bill to starting QB. I took a total of 11 snaps my senior year. So it doesn’t take a Detective Joe Friday to see he stole my football position AND he stole the hottest Pom squad girl at Eastern Heights from good old Billy Ray.”
Bill could feel the hair on the back of his neck stand up and a flush of blood filled his face and both hands clinched in an uncontrolled fighting response. Within a few seconds he felt a certain amount of self-control returning. He spoke slowly without looking at Billy Ray or anyone.
“If you look at the ‘82 gold trophy in the school’s trophy case and the gold wedding ring on Evelyn’s left hand you’ll quickly see who the winner is.”
Lunging toward Bill, Billy Ray shouted, “I shoulda killed you in ’83! Someday I’ll show you who the real winner is.”
Three classmates and the motel’s security guard separated the fighting mad duo. Billy Ray was led away to his room by the security guard. Billy Ray was shouting and screaming all the way.
Bill was shaken, embarrassed and regretted the entire situation. But it had happened and his caustic response was heard by everyone in the room. But after all, it was Billy Ray who was drunk and chose to replay his three decade long grudge in public. And he was glad he had resisted the animal urge to strike back and ruin the weekend for himself and all of his classmates. He had a king size headache and desperately in need of the comfort of Evelyn and a good night’s sleep. He said goodnight to all and retired to his room.
When Bill returned to his room he discovered a note from Evelyn on the bed. She wrote, “I’m in Betty Higgins’ room with the other Pom girls. Don’t wait up for me. Love, Evelyn.” Bill opened Evelyn’s small cosmetic bag and located the aspirins; took three and within ten minutes he fell asleep, completely dressed, on top of the bedspread, door unlocked, and the TV on ESPN.
Evelyn tried her key to their room only to discover the door was already unlocked. With only the dim light of the bathroom she proceeded to locate and turn on a small desk lamp.
Her screams of horror did not wake the dead but did empty all of the motel rooms and sent the security guard and desk clerk running to her.
She staggered backward out of the room and collapsed into a trio of guys with their arms extended toward her.
The security guard took one step into the room and saw a body with a blood soaked pillow half on and half off Bill’s head. The room smelled of gunpowder and liquor. A 911 call had been made when Evelyn’s screams were heard.
Within a couple of minutes the EMTs arrived and conducted a triage of the lifeless victim. They radioed their dispatcher and said the victim apparently died from a gunshot wound to his left temple.
A minute later the police arrived and locked down the entire motel. The EMTs turned to help Evelyn.
The police started their crime scene investigation and awaited the arrival of the medical examiner. All of the guests were ushered into the Brook Trout room and their rooms searched. Nothing significant was found.
One by one, each guest and staff members was taken to the Rainbow Trout room and individually questioned. This took just over five hours. Twelve people gave first person information of the confrontation Billy Ray had had with Bill earlier in the evening.
Evelyn and Beth Higgins were permitted to go to the lobby where Evelyn lay on a couch with a cold wash cloth on her forehead. Her sobbing would pause for a couple of seconds and when she would catch her breathe she seemed to cry with even greater intensity.
Billy Ray was still too drunk to be interviewed and was jailed as a person of interest.
Obviously, the reunion was cancelled and all except Billy Ray, Evelyn, and Betty, were permitted to go home. A crime scene yellow tape encircled the motel and the parking lot.
As Billy Ray started to get sober he realized what a fix he was in---it scared him---it scared him a lot.
Meanwhile, Buddy Adams headed home and wondered if Bill’s obituary would mention the ’82 game and his circus catch among five defensive backs. Two of the defenders played D-1 football and one of these super stars played 12 years in the NFL. He quickly dismissed his thoughts because no one remembered his catch in the greatest game ever played by Eastern Heights. Bill’s throw would always be part of the Eastern Heights’ oral football history.
As he drove across the dam road he slowed down, looked in his rearview mirror, lowered his window and tossed a black metal object and an almost full bottle of Wild Turkey into the deep end of Trout Lake.
He smiled and resumed the eight hour journey home.
Glenn <>< 4-28-2015
