Motorcycles and Tattoos

During our days at PCHS I knew of only two fellows that had motorcycles and a couple more that had motor scooters. The only real tattoos I saw then was on the Carnies at the County Fair.

1. Biker Wedding between Columbus and Nashville on the south side of Hwy 46. Several years ago I performed a wedding at this biker park for the son of one of our dearest friends.I saw a wide assortment of tattoos and the proud wearers of the INK, or Body Art, said the tattoos reflected their life story. Some must have had some very scary lives. After the ceremony was completed the bikers revved up the Big Hogs and it sounded like the start of the Indy 500! Believe it or not: The main course for the wedding meal was a pig that had roasted in a covered earth pit for several hours. It was very good.

2. In Oklahoma, tattoos are the In Thing, even for the women. I am amazed at how many young women get a tattoo at a "Secret" place and then wear their jeans or summer cutoffs so low the tattoo is no longer a "Secret!"

I had to conduct a funeral last year for a 15 year old student killed in a motorcycle accident. His father was up until 2am the morning of the funeral getting a tattoo to honor his fallen son. It was applied by the father's live in girl friend.

3.Arkansas Biker story. A mini-van driver from Oklahoma stopped at a Little Rock stop light. A half dozen bikers pulled along side and revved their bikes to gain his attention. He looked and saw each driver was accompanied by his "Old Lady"--biker term for girlfriend. Five of the female passengers looked as if the destination of the riders must be a Jenny Craig location. The sixth was skinny---so skinny she could shower in a shotgun.

But it was the lead rider that focused his attention. He was wearing a German WWI spiked helmet and on the spike was three green tomatoes! This leader of the pack looked at the peering van driver and smiled. His wide- spaced, front buck teeth looked as if he could eat corn on the cob through a picket fence!

Just before the light changed, the van driver noticed each of the  Arkansas bikers was wearing homemade tattoos---WITH MISSPELLED WORDS!

(The authenticity of the above story and the one that follows is very much in doubt)

4. A biker from Kentucky always wore his leather motorcycle jacket backwards. He had his "Old Lady" zip the jacket up in the back. The two were speeding on a gravel mountain road when he lost control. Several cars pulled off and many drivers and passengers rushed to their aid. Just then a Kentucky Highway Patrol car skidded to a halt and a member of "Kentucky's Finest" raced to the assembled crowd and asked, "What's going on here?" The first guy to arrive on the scene spoke, "Officer, the women was killed outright and the man was OK until we tried to turn his head around!!!